A colleague recently told me she always was in awe of me having my life together. She’s a single woman and thus she mentioned she didn’t know how I made life seem so easy when I have a husband, a toddler and am currently pregnant. It was a kind compliment and I thanked her but it got me thinking about how I view myself. I generally think I do have my life together but I also have a list of what I call “life homework” that’s piling up and I’m not very motivated at the moment to push up my selves and get to work. There is always more to be done I suppose and at this point, I have settled into thinking, sure I’ll get to that in the new year.
Often I think we are our own worst critics when it comes to this notion of having your “sh*t together”. I use to get so mad at myself when I didn’t do stuff on time and missed bills or opportunities because I was late getting stuff completed. But becoming a mother has completely changed my priorities once again, much like becoming a wife except to the extreme. And I need my weekends to unplug completely and re-charge. Plus I usually am running after a busy active toddler most Saturdays and Sundays so I still get physically tired anyway. I suppose you could say I’ve grown to accept that I don’t get to things as quick and I’ve come to understand my growing list of life to do’s will never really end. My husband has encouraged me lately to slow down and rest which I’ve been more than happy to do but sometimes I still get that nagging feeling of at what cost?
My colleague’s comment also made me reflect on how we often compare ourselves to others. I know I did this A LOT during my first year as a mama and it created unnecessary stress and guilt that I realized was my own doing. I decided to let go at being the “perfect” mom or having the “cleanest” house and just work to prioritize what had to be done and enjoy the little moments. I never feel like I’ve done enough but I go to bed most nights pretty sure life will go on anyway.
So this is all to say, we’re all works in progress and no one truly has everything in their life completely worked out and if they do- well I question if they are part robot. I’ve missed posting the last two weeks because life got busy and I didn’t get to it but hey, I’m just doing my best. I try to tell myself what I tell all my friends who tell me they are in similar situations- be kind and gentle to yourself. I know it sounds cheesy but its true. We’re all just doing our best, even if that looks different day to day, and to me, that is what it means to have you sh*t together!
K Space 