What do you do when you feel stuck in a rut? When you’re tired of the same old? What do you do to keep you motivated and feeling positive?
I’ve recently been thinking about what behaviors lead me down the path when I get to that breaking point and realize I am stuck in a routine I am tired of. I had this moment at work lately when I was just completely demotivated and although I had a million things to do, I had a really hard time encouraging myself to get on with it all and start checking off my to-do list. So, I took some time to just think about these feelings and what got me to that point to be more reflective and proactive to try something new perhaps this time around.
1) Burnout- I started a new job last September, moved to NYC in January this year and have been traveling and working non-stop since. I’ve taken exactly one week off the entire year and realized it was for my brother and sisters-in-law wedding in July which was magical but was a physically exhausting few days. Although I am proud of myself for truly having a work/life balance with this current position, I am also mentally and physically tired and need a real holiday. Turns out burn out for me can be a slow burn as well….
2) Passion work- I am someone who needs to LOVE what they do. I need to feel inspired, encouraged and motivated by those around me, the mission of the organization and even my day to day work tasks. For a while now I’ve been feeling like maybe I am not in the right sector- that maybe development work fulfills only part of my real passion work. I’ve felt like my creative side has been ignored for far too long.
3) Comparison- This is a slippery slope for me. I’ve found ironically that I tend to compare myself more to others than I did in my late teens/early 20s. I fall into that bad habit of thinking- well that person has this, or their life is so great, or don’t they have the dream job, or I wish I had more money like they do, etc., which is basically a way to throw a low key, destructive pity party for myself. Comparing myself to others has never been super helpful and makes me feel ungrateful and super guilty when I finally snap out of it. I’ve even found comparing myself at various ages unproductive. I am not who I was 10 years ago, nor will I be the same person 20 years from now.
4) The next best thing- I’m a planner. It’s both a good and bad quality because I tend to focus too much on what will come without staying focused on what’s currently happening but also it helps me to make things happen that I want in my life. I like to think there is always a silver lining, there is always a light at the end of the tunnel and that the next pasture over is a little bit greener and thus will make us happier. But sometimes there is no next best thing out there and the time and energy I focus on what will come would have been more useful today. When mixed with #5, this can be a deadly combo because I want to control everything and make things perfect but then get upset when life happens, and I must deal with harsh realities.
5) Control freak tendencies- yup, I’ve come to accept I have some real type-A tendencies that get me into trouble. Mostly they help me- I am pretty organized, very proactive and can be super efficient. BUT it comes at the cost of not being very collaborative with my partner at times and being too pushy, which is no bueno. I’m still working on finding my yang with this one…
So, in thinking about something new to look forward to in 2019, I am both reflecting on some things that I’m doing wrong but also doing right.
What I want to continue doing well includes…
- Doing nothing and enjoying it. Not planning every hour of my weekend. Soaking up relaxing moments for real.
- Take a vacation during my maternity leave.
- Spending some more time discovering what motivates, invigorates and inspires me.
- Networking to learn about other types of work and career paths.
- Continue working on staying focused on being present and having a strong gratitude practice.
- Break my comparative cycle by journaling, talking and being more present to myself.
- Swimming to stay sane.
- Letting go of control. But like really working to let go proactively and let someone else lead for a while.
- Meditating more as well.
Happy 2019 y’all in advance and enjoy this reflective time of the year. Listen to yourselves and be open to change.
K Space 